The 'Child's Play' Remake Introduces You To The New Chucky aka "Buddi"

Today is Cyber Monday, and what better time to reintroduce the world to a new high-tech version of everybody's favorite killer doll, Chucky! Or...er, Buddi?

The upcoming Child's Play remake has launched its official website, and while we always knew this version of Chucky would be more high-tech, the amount of features he apparently has make him seem more like a smartphone. Oh, and his name might not even be Chucky when all is said and done.  The website is done up to look like a giant advertisement for the Buddi doll, and here are some of his listed features...

  1. Buddi comes equipped with a highly intricate cloud-backed voice recognition engine capable of identifying speech.
  2. Using sophisticated Kaslan algorithms, Buddi can comprehend inflection, tonality and subtle variations in the human voice.
  3. Buddi learns both from human interaction and via its 20 sensors and cameras which provide detailed realtime information about its environment.
  4. Buddi utilizes state of the art sensor designs which provide high resolution image recognition and grip sensitivity.
  5. Buddi comes preloaded with the ability to fluently comprehend and converse in both English and Spanish with the option to expand via the Kaslan Language Acquisition App.
  6. The doll also features “Programming on your tablet, Advanced programming on your computer, and remote control on your smart phone.”
There's also a weird message from Harry Kaslan, founder of the company that produces the Buddi toy...

A message from Henry Kaslan:

Hello, friends! At Kaslan, we believe that happiness is about more than just entertainment. It’s about being known. Understood. Loved. It is our global mission to continue to create innovative and interactive products designed not only to educate and entertain, but to spread friendship across each and every household in the form of technological interconnectivity.

We at Kaslan take great pride in our unwavering focus to revolutionize technology in ways that positively impact the lives of friends across the world. And this, my friends, is our proudest moment. We’ve taken all of our research and learnings and applied them to create not only the most high-tech and interactive toy on the market, but a companion to be enjoyed by the whole family. Every child is important to us, and every child deserves a best friend, so we at Kaslan made it our top priority to build one.

It is with immense enthusiasm and pride that I introduce to you our most cutting edge, technologically advanced Kaslan product to date. Introducing your new best friend, Buddi. Available for pre-order now, Buddi will be joining households across the world starting June 21, 2019.

Thank you, friends!

Henry Kaslan
President and Founder, Kaslan Corporation

Okay, so there's a lot going on here. All I know is that a Chucky..er, Buddi doll that is basically a mini-Terminator lacks any real appeal to me. Maybe you feel differently.  I do know that I'll pay to see anything with Aubrey Plaza and Brian Tyree Henry in it, so at some point this will still get my money.

Child's Play will be directed by Lars Klevberg and open on June 21st 2019.