Disney's Been Paying Critics For Good Marvel Reviews, So A Petition Says

Dude. Did you know that Disney has been paying critics to give glowing reviews of Marvel Cinematic Universe movies? Yeah, like no kidding! Where the fuck is my Captain America: Civil War check??  I gave that shit 4.5/5! What more can I do?  Oh..wait, it's just a conspiracy theory by some tinfoil hat-wearing mofos?? Then tell that to the people who drew up a petition on change.org to stop Disney from paying critics to praise their films and bash any non-MCU superhero flick. Here's an excerpt...

"Disney has been continually paying critics to attack Non MCU movies. MCU movies are safe. They're not challenging at all. Just like a comic book movie is "supposed to be". They're not divisive or thought provoking. First they bashed Batman V Superman.They cleared BvS out of the way, gave Civil War (which wasn't a perfect film) an Oscar, now they're going to work on moving Apocalypse out the way...then they get offended when they're accused of accepting gifts. Deadpool would have also suffered the same fate however it was released in February and was not an immediate threat."

Man, that shit is wild. I WISH there was some truth to it. Trust me. My bank account could use it. But no, it's not true obviously. Just because 'Batman v Superman' and X-Men: Apocalypse are receiving poor reviews is that they have loads of problems, not because some bean counter at Disney cut a bunch of checks. They use Paypal.  Just kidding.

But hey, if you want to sign the petition for shits and giggles, then go ahead. And if you know anybody at Disney, let them know I work for cheap.